I know, my Blackberry takes really crappy photos, but I didn't think this deserved me dragging out the SLR digital and besides, I have a transcription below...
For some reason recently, trash has been ending up in my front yard. It seems that every day for the past two weeks or so, I’ve picked up five or six pieces: faded receipts, cigarette packages, tissues, grocery lists, drink cups, and all kinds of things that don’t belong on the lawn. As I perform this task, I’m mumbling under my breath about the low-down litterer that either threw it out the window or has let their trash fly with the wind. But yesterday, I finally found a real treasure, a Valentine Card from a cheapskate. Not only that, a cheapskate that’s dating a litter bug, which is a good thing for with a cheapskate in the house, there will at least be less stuff to throw away. Since I have no idea who wrote this, I’m going to post it on the internet for all to see. Feel free to bookmark this site just in case you may need the right words in the future to keep a significant other from killing you. If you do that, you might want to spruce up the grammar. It was difficult to copy this word by word with my computer attempting to make corrections for me. Or, if you’re having writers block, you might use this letter as a prompt to write a reply. What would you tell the cheapskate? Whatever, I hope this trashy love letter brings a smile…
Honey i hope you don’t mind a homemade card, here’s something’s i promise…
I promise to only think about our happy future together.
I promise to never mention the negative things in our past again.
I promise to think about how you feel more often.
I promise to try to make the best out of thing’s, so we can have alot of happy years ahead.
I want to be a part of your safe place, because i love you so much!
Happy Valentine’s day!
As a shout out, The Walking Man had a poem recently that speaks to this author (whoever she may be, and I’m assuming it’s a she for guys don’t have that good of handwriting, nor do we write with green pens; however, the grammar is “guy-like.”)
Speaking of trash, I really liked how Steven Colbert handled Glenn Beck's trash talk. Great satire! Check out this clip.