This afternoon at the pharmacy I paid forty bucks (my co-pay cost) for a gallon of a solution that’s cleansing my inside. For forty bucks I could have gotten a pretty decent bottle of scotch and it would have gone down a lot better too. Although this stuff isn’t nearly as bad as the pharmacist made it out to be, I wouldn’t be my beverage of choice either. I’m a little late starting the regiment as I had evening appointments. I’ve just down my third glass and already feel bloated (at 8 ounces every ten minutes, this is going to take a while…) Pray for me! Feel sorry for me! I want your sympathy! I want to milk this colonoscopy for all it’s worth!
I just had a thought. I have a 4 liter bottle of Nulytely something in the frig. What if, while I was out, somebody had gotten thirst and drank it for me? That could be a comic situation, except that nobody would have drunk more than a swallow or two.
Morning Update: Okay, that wasn't too bad--really it wasn't. I just had to make sure that for most of the night I stayed close to the porclein throne. I'm now weak (I'm glad I decided not to go to the gym yesterday afternoon while fasting from solid foods). I have to wait another 3 hours for my date at the hospital (it's not till 12:30), and see if I can avoid grabbing something to eat or drink until after than, but then I'll get that good drug everyone talks about and won't care what happens. You now know far more than you wanted to know!
Well, if it makes you feel better, I downed something while babysitting in my youth. I justopened the frige and grabbed the first thing. It had the consistancy of motor oil and tasted like pure D iron! #P
ReplyDeleteoops...fridge
ReplyDeleteSage, I think you may be underestimating that stuff's ability to move mountains and do it quickly. I'll bet by now you are bowing to the porcelain gods. I've been there/done that and I can sympathize! Hope all goes well.
ReplyDeletegood luck manana!!!
ReplyDeleteI hate that stuff! You have my sympathy.
ReplyDeleteYou have my sympathy too. But I will say, better you than me :)
ReplyDeleteJust to let you know, I have fully puckered up for the rest of the day. I'm heading back to the dentist this morning and I would seriously trade you if I could. Getting a probe stuck up the old shoots sounds much more pleasant to me.
ReplyDeleteLet your readers know if they also find that stick up there. ;-)
ReplyDeleteI have stubbornly/stupidly avoided such intimate encounters with my posterior. Have fun!!
ReplyDeleteKeep us updated.
ReplyDeleteyou have my total complete unequivocal sympathy... hope you feel better...
ReplyDeleteHope it all goes well for ya, Sage! Will be checking back to see how you're doing...
ReplyDelete