It’s nice to know that Murf, the one who is so concerned over my history, is a part of the after New Year “resoluters”crowding the gym this time of the year. Reading her account of being in the gym caused me to recall yesterday evening. To understand this story, I’ll have to lay out the design of the gym that I work out at. On one side are rows of cardio-type machines. The back row contains the elliptical machines, then there’s a row of treadmills, then a row of bicycles, then a mixed row of cross-country and rowing machines.
Yesterday, I was in the back on an elliptical machine. There was a good crowd and people were on machines to both my right and left. Most of the treadmills were in use, except for the one in front of me. Then one of those “Ponytail Girls” (who raises Murf’s ire) came in and began running on the treadmill in front of me. It was a nice diversion, but I was into my book. I’m listening to David Maraniss’, They Marched into Sunlight: War and Peace in Vietnam and America, 1967. I was learning about the players in the Dow Chemical protests at the University of Wisconsin in 1967, a topic that was keeping my mind off the swinging ponytail. (And if you can believe that…)
About that time, this guy who I see quite often in the gym came in. He’s way over-weight, always looks dirty, doesn’t talk to anyone but himself and acts as if he might not be all there, if you know what I mean. He took the bike right in front of the ponytail girl that was in front of me. All a sudden, everyone started laughing. I couldn’t see, but Ms. Ponytail was having hard time staying upright on the treadmill. She had one hand over her mouth and was holding herself up with her other hand. Then, to keep from being pulled under the threadmill as in the comics, she stepped off the machine, providing me with a view that I didn’t need to see. At least six inches of the crack of the guy on the bike was exposed. It was gross! I was glad when Ms. Ponytail regained composure and resumed exercising, allowing me to finish my workout.