Nevada Jack weighs in on politics

The politically incorrect reporting of a bear getting ready to hibernate.


All this mumbling about Kerry once again running for President is crazy. He can’t even tell a joke. If he could have told a few jokes back in 2004, he’d now be President. I don’t know if he’ would have been a better President, but it is hard to imagine him being any worse. He didn’t run a good campaign in 2004 and isn’t doing too good of a job this campaign season and he ain’t even running. His blotched joke has given Bush and all his henchmen something to talk about which takes the focus off the mess they’ve made.

Yesterday, Bush indicated he’s planning on keeping Vice President Dick Cheney and Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld around. I don’t understand why he’s keeping Rumsfeld, unless his idea for victory in Iraq is more of the same old failed ideas. And the President says the Democrats don’t have a plan for winning. He’s probably right, but neither does he have such a plan! Of course, I know why he keeps Cheney as VP. You can’t get a better insurance policy than having someone as sinister as Dead-eye Dick next in line for the presidency.

President Bush is now running around like a chicken with it’s head chopped off, trying to get as much support as he can muster for Republican candidates. Georgie Boy is worried. He knows the next two years might be a little uncomfortable if his party loses control of Congress and that wise system of checks and balances created by the Founding Fathers once again begins to work. Heck, if the Democrats take over, they might even dock his pay for those extended vacations he takes to his ranch in Texas.

Here is my advice to the political parties. The Democrats should continue to talk about Iraq and terrorism and how the two have no connection. And they should also hit the Republicans on the deficit and the economy. Can someone tell me when conservatism and economic irresponsibility started going hand in hand? I wish they could talk about morality and ethics, but both parties seem a little short supplied in that field. The Republicans, many of whom think they're divinely appointed, should look to the Good Book and take the advice of Proverbs 31:6-7. They should throw one heck of a beer bash on Monday night so that those who are perishing, those who are in distress or in poverty might “drink and remember their misery no more.” And as they recover from a hangover on Tuesday, they just might forget to vote, giving the status quo/stay the course party a chance to continue their failed polices.

Of course, I’m only a bear and can’t vote. But if Sage doesn’t vote, I’m going to gnaw his leg off. Enough ranting…

Addendum: I know, I really should stop ranting and start hiberating, but I need to say something about the Michigan gubernatorial race. Dick DeVos, the silver spooned heir to the Amway fortune, has put about $35 million (that's a lot of soap) of his own money into the race, with about $34.999 million going out for negative ads telling us how Granholm’s polices have failed, how she keeps making the same mistakes, how she blames everyone but herself, and so on. This is an interesting strategy for a Republican, for if you changed Graholm’s name to Bush, the commercials would be just as viable. And the scandal today is that DeVos lied about his high school football career (at least that's what his old coach says). However, we shouldn’t hold that against him, that’s just a macho thing. I’m sure there are a lot more former starting quarterbacks than there have been games played.