Many of you have wondered just how Bob Evans makes Eggs Benedict since they don't do any poaching (or at least the restaurant in Big Rapids Michigan doesn't poach). I sent Nevada Jack out to do some snooping and he found this recipe in a dumpster behind a restaurant.
Bob Evan's Eggs Benedict (aka White Trash Eggs)
Stale white bread
Some kind of yellow/orange sauce
Toast a piece of stale white bread and place some scrambled eggs on it. Bob likes to cook his eggs in bacon fat, and then make sure they’ve dried out well so you get all the cholesterol and none of the taste. Eggs Benedict is also a dish that allows Bob to recycle those eggs that stayed under the heat lamp too long, a great recycling program. Bob considers himself a Green (which, I'm not sure is a badge of honor when you're in the egg business, unless you’re Dr. Seuss). Next, fry up a piece of bologna and place it on top of the eggs. Top the eggs with sauce. Use outdated package Hollandaise sauce, replacing butter with the cheapest margarine you can find. If packaged Hollandaise sauce is unavailable, melt some processed cheese food over it.
Sage’s note: Although Bob Evans doesn’t serve alcohol (it sounds like he should be a distiller of cheap bourbon), if you making this at home you might compliment it with a aged bottle of Boone’s Farm or MD-80 wine. As for where the name Egg Benedict came from, supposedly it was first served to Benedict Arnold by an American Loyalist, in an attempt to poison him after he changed sides and joined the British.
Other things happening in the world:
Congratulations: Be sure to stop over and congratulate Ed Abbey and the Misses on the birth of Little Abbey! You might include some helpful hints about diaper changing and midnight feedings. Let’s pray that Little Abbey is out of the hospital soon so she can enjoy the nursery Ed has been remodeling for the past nine months.
A Couple Sites I'm Enjoying: For incredible storytelling (check out his post about male bathroom ediquette), look up Bone. And for some wonderful poetry, visit Pat Paulk at Laughing Ghost. Ever wonder why all the best writers are from the South? I’ll have to add both to my blogroll when I get around to it.
More about food: Laurie, down in the Old North State and already on my blogroll, is trying to eat locally produced food. She recently had a link to the best food in NC. If you can’t eat locally, at least make sure it’s from North Carolina! Check out the quiche dish, they don’t serve that at Bob Evans (and notice, Bob didn’t even make the “honorable mention” list).
Some more speaking about food: I've been pretty busy lately (which is why I haven't been blogging as much), but I did get around yesterday to cooking for the contractors who are volunteering at the Habatit for Humanity's "Blitz Build." There are some 400 houses being built this week across the nation, one just outside of our little town. A couple of us fed about 25 construction workers (boy can they eat!). Lunch was a dutch oven feast of baked chicken, potatoes and onions, salad, cobbler and ice cream. Of course, the salad and ice cream didn't get cooked in the dutch ovens.
And finally, a softball update, we beat the Assembly of God Church last night by some incredible amount (I stopped paying attention when we were up 19 to 3). I played half the game, went two for four, scoring one run. Although they’re not nearly as good as our rivals, the Baptists, they seem to have more fun as they don’t take the game as seriously.