Saturday, December 05, 2009

Nevada Jack comes out of hibernation

I’ve decided to come out of hibernation, at least for a day. While Sage sits and stares into his first fire of the season and the snow falls outside, I would like to make a few comments on what the human specie is up to..

First of all, I want to address the fuss over Tiger Woods. I don‘t know what you all were expecting, but the man was just living up to his name. Tigers are always on the prowl. And y'all are making such a big fuss over it. On Thursday, I decided to keep Sage company as he drove to a meeting. He was listening to the BBC news hour and low and behold, they were asking some world famous cricket about Tiger’s recent incident. First of all, I don’t see how this guy was world famous, for neither Sage or I had any idea as to who he was. The only world famous cricket I know is Jiminy Cricket, but Sage corrected me and said that he wasn’t a cricket but a cricketer. Now I know cricketers, you got them down South, they catch crickets and sell them to bait shops, or so I thought. Sage explained that Cricket was a game they played in England and India and a few other places where the British flag used to fly and as far as he was concerned, it was about as boring to watch as golf, which is probably why they were talking to a cricketer about a golfer. This brings me back to this Tiger guy, if you wouldn't obsess so much about him, it wouldn’t be a big deal. And for Tiger, he ought not get too upset at everyone having him under scrutiny, After all, such obsession is why he gets paid the big bucks. If most people didn't care, he and his banker might have other concerns.

Another thing, the Federal Trade Commission is beginning to crack down on amateur bloggers who don’t reveal their profits. According to the ruling, if a blogger is given a product and reviews it, he or she better disclose that fact that they were given a free gift. I know Sage is guilty of reviewing three books that were gifts, one from the author and two from the wife the author. Since he thought this ruling didn’t apply to him, I thought I’d take it on myself and confess his sins. The books are Rob Krosee’s Mercury Falls (he won this book in a contest on facebook) and Martin Clark, Plain Heathen Mischief and The Many Aspects of Mobile Home Living. (Another of Mr. Clark’s books, The Legal Limit, Sage actually laid down hard cash to purchased). There you have it, a full disclosure that will hopefully save Sage $10,000 and a few starchy jailhouse dinners.

Of course, if you read the article, it seems that Sage has really been missing out. Undoubtedly, there is great fear in the wine review world that this new regulations will cause the flow of free wine to reviewers to cease. Why hasn’t Sage been reviewing wine? What’s wrong with the boy? Can you get free beers or free whiskey or free cigars by writing favorable reviews? I’m sure Sage would like to know, but he better not talk about Cuban cigars or he'll get in trouble by another agency.

Last winter, Sage decided to install AdSense, with the idea that he’d donate anything his blog made to the local food bank. Of course, he refuses to put any effort into trying to generate revenue, except to have that silly ad in the sidebar that everyone ignores. To date, his lack of hard work has resulted in a total of $8.37 in earnings, which ain’t even enough to get Google to cut a check (you have to have ten dollars to actually get paid). I sure hope someone else is donating to the food bank and not holding out for Sage to save the day. But since Sage enjoys writing and confessing and bragging in these pages, that will have to be payment enough for him.

Ya’ll have a good weekend and keep yourselves warm with this cold weather we’re enjoying.


  1. I need an alter-ego to post for me when I'm too tired, like now. Now I wonder who I could get to do that?!

    Tiger is just one more in a long line of men who can't keep their pants zipped up - or stay home.

  2. Hi Nevada! Welcome!!

    Tell Sage you did an excellent job in his absence. :o)

  3. Just because he has an innocent face and he seems like a good guy doesn't make TW a saint. Having lots of $$$ doesn't make him a saint. Honestly, don't we have other news to focus on...why is this guy drawing all the attention? What he's done isn't anything new under the sun.

    Love Nevada Jack, btw!

  4. Tell me you will be updating your profile picture to the one of your feet and your fireplace.

  5. I actually enjoy watching golf. You know what, I'm going to believe National Enquirer from now on - see they talked about John Edwards and his mistress and it turned out to be true. They talked about Tiger Woods and it was true too! This year we have heard so many juicy stories - Edwards, Ensign, Sanford, now Woods! Oh Navada Jack, you may want to give National Enquirer a hand to keep the juicy news coming! :)

  6. Tiger and the party crashers are only staying in the headlines to divert the sheep from the real news.

  7. Kenju, yawn is right!

    Karen, Nevada Jack kept poking at the Bush Administration till it was no longer funny and then went into hiberation

    Ily, you're right, there are a lot more important things happening in the world, or at least things that make more of a difference in my life!

    Murf, do you miss that photo?

    Mother Hen, if newspapers keep failing, the National Enquirer maybe the only one left... You like golf? Do you like paint drying, too?

    Teena, thanks!

    Walking Guy, I don't mind being a sheep, but I sure don't want the media to be my shepherd!

  8. How do I get in on this free wine reviewing? and do they have free beer reviewing? Man I'm slow.

  9. I need an alter ego, but alas, I'm afraid a garden slug would not have as much affection from readers.

    As for Tiger Woods, science has yet to fabricate an instrument capable of detecting my interest in his, or any other celebrity's, personal issues. I merely listen and nod, and realize that fame and wealth are not impediments to buggering up one's on life.

    There, but for the Grace of God, etc.


  10. I'm sad that it's evident we have lost our desire to keep our virtues and values within relationships thus what will it be like in 20 years.

    Regarding the in the Buffalo's back..

    Dorothy from grammology

  11. Charles, if you find any beer contacts, let me know... I'd particularly like to review stouts and porters

    Randall, A slug is an okay alter-ego AS LONG AS you don't show us a picture!

    Dorothy, Thanks for stopping by. From what I remember, Buffalo can be very cold--went to a Bill's night game there in November once... pretty chilly

  12. I hope you're kidding about the Federal Trade Commission.

  13. Nevada....
    I'm thinking that maybe ole Sage might let you write a little more on his blog; the heat you might take from exploiting his thoughts is probably comforting to him and certainly a delight to the rest of us! ... keep up the good work, like so many responders to this article I'm now on a search for my alter-ego.

  14. Jen, the link was to an article in Wired concerning the FTC ruling

    Sleepy Head, it's nice to have an alter-ego for my alter ego!

  15. Mommy, tech and prod placement bloggers get the stuff they're talking about. I love books much but I would so love free cleaning supplies and keep meaning to do a post about that. I'd really love free tech things too

  16. WOW Nevada, this is a good reason to come out of hibernation, isn't it? everybody's talking about it! People need their gossip portion about celebrities -including myself-. "This is what happens when you marry the Emperor" -I've read this in the blogsphere. Maybe it's true: rich, attractive, young, famous and winner. He must have a million women behind him, LOL.

  17. Nevada: Welcome! I try to avoid news like TW because it is rather sad and personal. But then, I was born in the Mid-West. :D)

  18. Haha. Funny stuff here, Nevada.

    Hopefully someday soon Sage'll get a check from Google. Then he'll just have one more thing to tell the government about!

  19. a few starchy jailhouse dinners

    You speakin' from experience, Nevada Jack?

    I was just thinking the other day that it was about time for a Nevada Jack post, which in itself, is a bit frightening.

  20. I wonder if Desert Rat will ever come back from where ever he is at. I haven't done much satirical or political posting as of lately for some reason. I think I OD'd the last election cycle.

  21. Pia, I can't see you going for courting destiny to good housekeeping! :)

    Leni, I like the quote about marrying the Emporer

    Michael, avoiding news has got to be good for our mental health

    TC, at $10, that shouldn't be much of a tax hit

    Bone, I speak from experience, but probably not what you think :)

    Ed, see if you can find Desert Rat, we need cynics